Dirty Jobs

AngryMark wrote up Sunday's race well enough that I won't be rewriting it, except to add that I finished 22nd (about mid-pack), and to wish that somebody, anybody, would work with me off the front.

I will write instead about the nitty-gritty of volunteering at a race. Needless to say (and yet I say it anyway), nobody worked as hard as Rob, who put on an amazing weekend of races in the face of enormous weather-related adversity.
Henceforth, he shall be known as EpicRob

Also, I will post some pictures that SpikyHairWill, photog extraordinaire and badass A racer, took throughout the weekend:

Warming Up for the ITT
Post-Scrum, Pre-Crit
Corner at the Top of the Hill
BeastMasterChris, C-men's D1 Dominator

So, Livingston campus was shut down for the circuit race... mostly. Unfortunately, by virtue of being on a college campus, people had to go do their jobs, attend their events, etc, and we simply couldn't completely close the roads. We did our best to appease everyone, but some people were just ass-hats. To them I say this:

Cones and Barriers mean DO NOT GO HERE. They don't mean "Get out of your car and move the obstacles", and they don't mean "Drive offroad". They certainly don't mean "Drive directly at the person waving frantically at you to get off the road in a very one-sided game of chicken".

Now that that's off my chest, let me tell you about Parking Lot Cleanup. Since we're not a varsity sport, we basically had to turn ourselves inside out (especially Rob) to get access to our venue. To ensure the longevity of the Rutgers Classic, we make every effort to deny the powers that be any reason to complain about us. This includes ensuring the cleanliness of the parking lots where the 450 racers warmup, cool down, and generally habitate for a day.

HardTailJay made a very astute observation last year: Just once, it'd be nice to see the Rutgers Basketball team cleaning up the RAC's parking lot after a home game.

Then again, varsity athletics' spectators probably don't make as much of a mess as the bike gamers.

Granted, much of what we picked up was clearly not from our guests, like rusted metal and incredibly dirty gloves. Then again, the empty Gel packets and the fresh banana peels and apple cores were pretty clearly cycling-related.

It is also very clear to me now that a byproduct of bike racing is bottled urine. For some reason, bike racers can't coast the 200m to the restrooms. Instead, they pee in empty water bottles... and then neglect to throw those water bottles away.

So, as Jay and I wandered about the parking lot on Saturday, we kept track of how much urine we collected. The grand total was easily 3 gallons... plus the 1.5 gallons that we made Dartmouth dispose of before they left. And may I just say "Go to Hell" to UVM for leaving a full liter under their van, then waving at us as they drove away while we picked it up.

Karmic justice was served, though, on Sunday. I walked by UVM and asked them if they had any pee for us today. They said no. I said "well, that big empty cardboard box says UVM on it, please throw it away". One of them picked it up, and it flipped in the gusty wind and landed on him. Apparently, at least one of the UVM maniacs had micturated (in this fair city) in the cardboard box. The urine-soaked cardboard was most unpleasant for the UVM kid.

I laughed.