Creepy Fans

Everybody's written about the little ugly singer girl. And the fake fireworks. And the underage gymnasts. And occasionally, they even write about how they've been dealing with rampant poverty.

But has anybody blogged about the creepy cycling "fans"? Not until today.

Being a cycling enthusiast with an internet connection, I'm currently watching a replay of last night's Olympic Time Trial competition. Don't worry, I won't put any spoilers here - except I must divulge that Lance Armstrong didn't win.

One thing you should know about bike racing is that spectating is free, at least for road races. If you want to watch, just get yourself to somewhere on the course and wait for the cyclists to fly by.

The Olympic road races from last weekend were noteworthy for their utter lack of spectators. In post-race interviews, a common theme was how unnerving it was to be racing in silence.

Of course, cycling isn't huge in China, and from the looks of things, the bulk of the racing was conducted in the middle of nowhere. It isn't surprising that there weren't a ton of spectators.

Apparently the Chinese organizers and police have been a little overzealous, too.

Sayeth the article:
" Officials reportedly will ask the Chinese to relax their security to allow more fans on the road side for the time trial"

When you're not letting the racers' own families watch the race, it's a pretty good sign you've gone too far. Wives shouldn't have to bribe policemen or sneak over fences just to watch their husbands ride in circles in the middle of nowhere.

Well, I'm watching coverage. It would appear the organizers did not relax. There appear to be about three dozen fans, concentrated in little packs about the 24k course. Most of them are wearing official Beijing Olympics T-shirts, similar to what you see aides wearing on the sidelines of other sports.

The organizers aren't stupid. They know that their policy has raised eyebrows in the cycling community, and they mustn't allow The Party to appear flawed. But they can't just let spectators move freely about the course... that could be catastrophic!

And so they settled on the creepiest solution possible: Little crowds of BOGOC employees are sure to behave, so place them in small groups near the most frequently used cameras.

Oh, and make sure they make noise. The only way to be certain is to have a drill sergeant cheerleader. Seriously, watch the coverage. It's the same chant over and over. China's answer to R. Lee Ermey shouts something, presumably in some dialect of Chinese, and the crowd echoes it in unison. Ad nauseum.

It creeps me out. People being wrangled like steer, standing where they're told to stand and shouting when and what they're told to shout. Or, I dunno, maybe they just spontaneously clustered that way, after getting off the government-provided buses (okay, that bus part was just conjecture, but it wasn't unreasonable).

Ride faster, Danny! For ever and ever and ever